It’s Impact On Our Lives
New Jersey Therapy and Life Coaching, Voorhees NJ, Marlton NJ, and Cherry Hill NJ (856) 352-5428 Contact NJTLC
I have heard many clients discuss how social media impacts their lives. While it offers instant connection, it also contributes to anxiety, low self-esteem, and a growing sense of isolation for many people. We’re wired for connection, and social media taps into that need. It helps us stay in touch, share moments, and feel a part of something. However, most online interactions are superficial, and the more time we spend scrolling, the more likely we are to feel disconnected from genuine, real-life relationships.
Destructive Power
Over the years, many clients and couples have sought marriage or relationship counseling as a result of the impact of social media on their lives or marriages. Online cheating, including chatting and meeting someone else, is not uncommon. Some of my clients come in and discuss their relationship as if their partner were right there. I then learn that they are “dating” someone they met online and have never been with in person. I have seen online connections and relationships end marriages. So many believe they will never get caught. When they do, they are surprised at their partner's reaction. “It’s only an online thing, I’m not cheating.” But you are sharing a love connection with someone else.
Don’t Compare
One of the most common issues I see is comparison. Social media encourages people to present idealized versions of their lives. My clients often end up comparing their reality to someone else’s abbreviated Life story, which fuels self-doubt and dissatisfaction, especially when it comes to appearance, success, or lifestyle.
But I don’t believe social media is all bad. When used mindfully, it can be a tool for learning, connection, and creative self-expression. Some clients find supportive online communities or mental health content that helps them feel seen and understood. The key is balance. I encourage clients to set boundaries around social media use—whether that means time limits or simply choosing not to check certain apps at night. Even small changes, like these, can reduce stress and improve your mood.
Limiting Usage
It’s also helpful to limit how many social media sites you use. You don’t need to be on every app. Focus on the ones that genuinely add value to your life, and avoid those that tend to pull you into endless scrolling or negativity. I often recommend unfollowing accounts that trigger insecurity or comparison, such as fitness models, influencers, or gossip pages. If it doesn’t inspire you or support your mental health, it doesn’t need to take up space in your mind.
Stay Grounded in the Real World
I encourage people to stay grounded in the real world. I challenged a client about her talking about social media as if it were real life. One client said that social media was part of her real life, that one blends into the other and affects her life equally.
Turn off your phone when you eat. Be fully present with family and friends. Schedule breaks from social media and use that time to do something meaningful—read, walk, rest, or engage in something enjoyable. You can’t necessarily avoid social media completely, but you can choose how you interact with it. With healthy boundaries, mindful use, and a focus on real connection, it’s possible to enjoy social media without letting it negatively affect your mental health.